Is This My Blog or Your Blog?

blog audience prioritiesAnybody who blogs can remember your first post, second post and the empowerment you experienced.  The empowerment I felt after leaving behind a career of fifteen years in the corporate world to pursue my dreams as an entrepreneur and being free to write about what I wanted to write about was beyond words.  I remember getting those little butterflies as I hit send and would wait to see if anyone read those early posts. I still remember the first nice man who commented on my first blog post, “Go Big or Go Home“.

It was such a breath of fresh air from the corporate high tech, late night spin sessions, writing corporate speak, helping top executives spin their decks and personal platforms for the latest high tech craze of the dot bomb era. Oh those were the days and I wouldn't trade them for anything.

However, when I took the driver seat behind the keyboard of my own blog, the freedom was indescribable. I found that the more I shared about myself and my own personal feelings, the more people read and followed my blog. The same went for Twitter. The more I shared of me, the more they followed, tweeted, retweeted, talk to and inspired me. It was truly my readers who empowered me to be me.

For me, blogging came easy. I have never been a woman short on words. It's crazy to think I started this blog just over a year ago. I started with our agency blog. It was my readers who pushed me to having my own blog, separate from the agency. It was crazy the result once I made such a step. In less than a year my blog made it to the AdAge Power 150, Technorati Top 100 Small Business and more. I am not telling you this to brag, but telling you this because you can do the same thing. However, you can only do it if you speak and blog as “you” not what the world wants you to be.

Stuck in a rut
Over the last few months I have hit a couple walls in regard to content. I think as a blog becomes more successful with it comes additional pressure to write about certain topics and make the “crowd” happy.  I don't usually let the pressure get to me as I am a strong believer that blogs are meant to include real opinions versus be a digital piece of collateral for me to sell you on my business or spin my content just to get rankings and traffic.

Yet, without thinking I let the “me” fall out of my last couple months of posts. I am not stating I didn't still try to rock out the best content I possibly could. I am simply stated I hit a wall and was not able to crank out as much content as I could before, because of the “pleasing” mentality.

I made the mistake of falling prey to the mean bullies who have commented and informed me of how I was using social media or auto follow tools that I didn't know existed. Yes, I had one guy literally tell me that I use such a tool. However, that's a whole other blog post in itself that I am not going to give such person the glory of spending the time to write myself.

Our business is growing like crazy.  We're going global, going deeper local and rolling out a whole new and enhanced set of services. With such craziness I have to admit I got lazy and started taking the easy way out by writing the content that is more likely to please everyone.  Yes, the blog traffic is doing great considering I have only had time to write maybe one to posts a week. However, I am not as fulfilled as I should be after I write and post a piece.


blog content empowermentA Wake-up Call
Margie Clayman– who is a member of one of my Tribes on Triberr has had some blog posts lately that just nail this topic and the importance of being yourself. It was Margie who helped me realize I had fallen into such a trap of pleasing versus blogging. After reading her latest post lastnight “Sorry, But I'm Not Taking Sides” it really hit me. Thank you Margie!

It is one of my favorite things about being a member and proud supporter of Triberr. Because I read every post I tweet from each and every tribe member it opens my eyes to other insights, opinions and hearts I might not take the time to hear or feel if it wasn't for such. It is the original vision that Dan Cristo and Dino Dogan had when they started Triberr. They wanted to give the “little” guys (and gals) a chance at more eyeballs. I have so loved seeing people's business and blogs soar as a result of their hard work.  So Triberr and all my Tribe mates I want you to know that even if I have been an overall bad tribe woman lately with such little time to spend with you, please know you still are helping me grow and I appreciate you. I hope I am doing the same for you!

Taking my blog back!
So from here forward I am going to take my blog back. I hope you still come read. I promise to still post all the content you like, need and ask for.  However, I am also going to carve out more time for the content I like to write, even if it ticks you off.

For those that know me you know I welcome a good debate. I have met some amazing people via the social world that started off with a heated debate that I am proud to now call friends in real life.

I am not asking you to hold back your opinions even if they completely disagree with my thinking. I am asking however, that you do so in a way that is respectful to me, our community and yourself. Don't pretend to know the tools that I use, the tools I don't use or the reasons I keep or delete my connection to any influence measurement system, social network or blogging platform.

I will do as I have always done which is tell you the truth and back up my opinions, claims and recommendations. I hope you like them. However, if you don't, then don't read them. There are plenty of other blogs you can read and hopefully find one that you like and can support versus simply finding blogs to pick fights and gain attention for yourself. An even better recommendation would be to maybe start your own blog or start blogging more to focus on your own voice and community building.

I also ask that if you see me starting to hand my blog back over to the bullies and status quo pleaser crowd that you please call me out on it, please! I promise I will do the same to you. Deal?

Your Turn

What are your thoughts? Do you stay true to yourself on your blog? Have you ever fallen into such a trap for a season or two? When you hit writers block is it maybe for the same reason, that you have lost yourself somehow? I would love to have a healthy and forward moving discussion on this. I think we can all help one another stay true to the reasons why we started our blogs in the first place while still providing value to our readers.



About the Author:

CEO / Founder Marketing Nutz, full service social media, digital marketing, experiential brand, conversion optimization agency. Ranked by Forbes as Top 10 Social Media Women and 10 Social Media Power Influencer. Keynote speaker, author, strategist, consultant, coach, & trainer. Helps businesses of all sizes integrate social media into the DNA of their business, connect with target audiences to nurture authentic customer relationships. 15+ years experience working with Fortune 500, Franchised corporations with 4000+ local franchises to entrepreneurs and startups.


  1. jedi_roach January 16, 2012 at 2:55 pm

    Good post! Yes blog about what you want, you have to enjoy it otherwise why do it right? I also read every post in Triberr before I post it so we are the same on that score!

    • PamMktgNut January 16, 2012 at 3:23 pm

      @jedi_roach Amen! I am always the one to preach being real, being yourself no matter what. Sometimes I just need a wake up call to realize the ruts I fall in. Thx for taking the time to read and comment! 🙂

  2. SarahArrow January 16, 2012 at 3:25 pm

    Pam, I love what you write it resonates with me and as a fellow tribe mate I still have confidence that when you write what pleases you, it will please my followers too. Go kick some butt xx

    • PamMktgNut January 17, 2012 at 7:51 am

      @SarahArrow Amen Sarah! People buy from people, people read from people. How are you doing? Hope all is well in your world. I am due for a visit to your blog!

      Appreciate you taking time to comment! xoxo

  3. margieclayman January 16, 2012 at 3:36 pm

    This is really an honor Pam, not just to be mentioned in such a positive way by someone whom I respect a great deal, but also to think that I was able to have a positive impact on you. Thank you! 🙂

    • PamMktgNut January 17, 2012 at 7:43 am

      @margieclayman Margie – awwww… you have always inspired me. I have much respect for you as well. Your last few posts really hit me hard and I thank you for that. Glad our tweet and life paths crossed. Look forward to getting to know you better in 2012! Thanks for being you! 🙂

      • ckburgess January 18, 2012 at 4:34 pm

        @[email protected] Pam and Margie, First this is a really great post Pam! As for Margie — Margie you’re is a “creative content genius”.

        Both of you inspire your readers!


  4. KimberlyMoore January 16, 2012 at 3:39 pm

    Fantastic post and eery since I have been complaining to my biz partners about the exact same thing! Glad to have found you & I look forward to reading more!

    • PamMktgNut January 17, 2012 at 7:46 am

      @KimberlyMoore Thanks Kimberly. It happens to the best of us even if you have plans for it not to. The best thing to do is develop an editorial calendar and focus on the needs of your audience but keeping it within your own voice. I like to keep a running list of blog ideas on my iphone in Evernote. AFter I wrote this post yesterday I have 25+ ideas. Sometimes you just have to give your mind the ability to be set free and not let the world of today put you or your biz in a box. Best of luck to you! I will be posting some tips as I go thru this transition of the things I did to stay true to my word! Hopefully they can help others as well. Have a great day!

  5. arkarthick January 16, 2012 at 4:43 pm

    IMO, blogging is like a mirror we see everyday – so staying true to our uniqueness and not pretending like others form the core of a good blogger. I’m sure @PamMktgNut , you never miss to show us who you’re. Creative/writers block is temporary. It can’t stand against our willpower. Meanwhile, there are some people who always trying to bring us down. Experience in my competitive business field taught me a lot about this. Fortunately, I learned the art-of-cutting-the-cr*p quickly. It works like a charm. See, it’s pointless to dwell in others’ unworthy opinions. That being said I’m always open to constructive criticism just like you. Happy blogging! 🙂


    • PamMktgNut January 17, 2012 at 7:48 am

      @arkarthick Amen! I think we think much alike. You are right in that it will never stand against our willpower. The mind is a powerful thing, particularly when it’s packed with creativity, drive and a desire to help others. Eventually it’s going to burst and be set free! We must be open to opinions, learn from them and discuss them as needed but focus our time and thoughts on the people who do such in a constructive way. Life is too short to not surround yourself and spend the time with the good eggs! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment! Have a beautiful day!! 🙂

  6. SociallyGenius January 16, 2012 at 8:56 pm

    Pam, first time commenter long time fan(like I’m calling a radio show). I’m sure your friends followers, and fans will keep coming back because we like YOU, not who you think we want you to be. As for Triberr, I feel like a kid at the candy store. . I’m a newbie and am blown away that I have established bloggers actually sharing my posts. Keep it real Pam – it’s the way to be!

    • PamMktgNut January 17, 2012 at 7:50 am

      @SociallyGenius Thanks so much for the kind words. Yup, keeping it real is the ONLY way to be. It’s funny as today is our 1 year anniversary of #GetRealChat.

      Yes, Triberr rocks and can really enable people to help one another if they use it ethically. Happy to hear you are seeing good result. Keep up the good work!

  7. darlenefigueira January 17, 2012 at 4:22 pm

    @lorirtaylor oh baby! to também com saudades de vc e nossos papos legais

  8. BullsandBeavers January 17, 2012 at 9:08 pm

    RT @mqtodd Is This My Blog or Your Blog? via @PamMktgNut

  9. JimGenet January 17, 2012 at 10:20 pm

    Our first meeting. Very enjoyable. Speak from within and your reach is magnified by the power of authenticity. Your voice is demonstrating this truth. Press on.

  10. mirjam January 18, 2012 at 1:51 am

    I have enjoyed reading this post! I came here via twitter, I have not been blogging very long but I can so relate to blogging and twitter being an encouragement to be yourself. And that is exactly the way it should be. So go ahead, take your blog back!

  11. Ajay2Jaipur January 18, 2012 at 2:00 am

    @JessicaNorthey I support #wikipediablackout! Show your support here

  12. lauraleewalker January 18, 2012 at 2:22 am

    What a great, personal post Pam! I feel like I know you more as a person after reading this. Your post is a real breath of fresh air and you’ve inspired me take a step back with my own blog and ask myself some important questions. A big, heartfelt thank you!

    • PamMktgNut January 28, 2012 at 4:35 pm

      @lauraleewalker Thanks Laura. I think that’s my favorite thing about blogging is that we get to see into each others brains and hearts. It’s both that challenge us and pull us to be better, do better and be our true self. Thx so much for taking time to comment.

  13. MZazeela January 18, 2012 at 7:34 am

    Great thinking, Pam. There is no way to ensure that you will make everyone happy. No way to ensure that everyone will like you. No way to ensure that everyone will agree with your thoughts. Trying to please everyone seems to have a way of making oneself less than happy.

    All the more reasons to be yourself. If folks like Marc Zazeela, that’s great! If they don’t, I can live with that too. And, if someone makes a disparaging comment, I promise not to cry.


    • PamMktgNut January 28, 2012 at 4:37 pm

      @MZazeela Thanks Marc. I agree with you. Not possible to make everyone happy. If we hit even a small percent we are probably doing alright!! Ha 😉

  14. marccusters January 19, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    @ClemLelardoux Thank you for the RT Clement!

  15. bdorman264 January 21, 2012 at 8:59 pm

    Hey Pam, because I’m only writing for myself and it’s a personal blog I do feel I have been able to stay true. I’m just happy people are showing up and we are having dialogue. For now I’m not writing for metrics, SEO or anything else so it’s easy to write for myself, huh?

    I’m having fun with it and have found what is sustainable for me; so write on, huh?

    • PamMktgNut January 28, 2012 at 4:38 pm

      @bdorman264 Yes!! We have to find joy in what we write. It is always far better work if your heart is into it!

  16. craigbooker January 22, 2012 at 2:58 pm

    Pam, I think it’s tough to be true to yourself when you get the attention you have gained. I am new to blogging and can’t imagine having that many eyes on my posts. I think that it’s key to revisit why you started blogging. I started blogging in part to improve my communication skills. I also wanted to share my passion with others. Through the process of writing my thoughts down, I discovered how much blogging was part of my personal development. My audience, whether 1 or 1000 will respect me only if my content reflects me. They read my blog to learn my perspective and not what others want me to say.

    • PamMktgNut January 28, 2012 at 4:41 pm

      @craigbooker Yes! This is exactly what we discussed on the #GetRealChat last week. Where we ended was that people read our blogs to be educated, inspired etc. however, within those needs they also want a piece of “you” the writer. They want “you” to come thru.

      So yes I think the blog belongs to the writer but with a servant heart to serve the readers. Yet not to a level where it changes the you within the content, conversation or other.


  17. HeidiCohen January 28, 2012 at 1:54 pm

    Pam–I agree determining what topics to cover on your blog is a difficult line between what your readers expect and what your heart wants to express. Additionally, Margie Clayman is a great leader in showing bloggers how to craft strong posts that quietly make her point without hurting anyone. Happy marketing, Heidi Cohen

    • PamMktgNut January 28, 2012 at 4:46 pm

      @HeidiCohen Yup, it’s always the toughest decision. I recently started a new Christian personal blog as well as finally hopped on Posterous & Tumblr again. I plan to develop a plan where I can also share more of myself for those interested to read.

      It’s funny as the first couple posts on the Christian blog had a 1000 views within a couple hrs. So proves the point that some folks are looking for that deeper insight into the blogger’s thoughts etc.

      Where I struggle though is ….. How many blogs does one crazy but need!! Ha 😉

  18. PamMktgNut January 29, 2012 at 8:45 am

    @heidicohen hey thanks Heidi!! Happy Sunday to you!! 🙂

  19. cottageguru February 26, 2012 at 9:59 pm

    @PamMktgNut Going to read that one…#blogchat

  20. SociallyGenius February 26, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    @PamMktgNut That’s when we had our lil comment conversation moment that inspired me – it’s my blog @MackCollier #blogchat

    • PamMktgNut February 26, 2012 at 10:05 pm

      @SociallyGenius @MackCollier I love that it inspired you. So happy to hear that. You just need to get out there & do it! #blogchat

      • SociallyGenius February 26, 2012 at 10:08 pm

        @PamMktgNut each one keeps getting more & more views & even got mentioned a pretty well known blog! I’m heading in right direction #blogchat

        • Dollyu558 February 26, 2012 at 10:09 pm

          @SociallyGenius Get One Direction to follow you! check out onedirectionfollowback2.blogspot .com (make sure u remove the space before .com)

        • PamMktgNut February 26, 2012 at 10:09 pm

          @SociallyGenius Congrats! Happy for you! Keep up the good work & let me know how I can help. You deserve it. #blogchat

  21. patricksplace February 26, 2012 at 11:16 pm

    Glad to hear that you got back on track in terms of keeping control of your blog.  I see both sides of the arguments people tend to make about who a blogger’s really writing for.
    If a blogger isn’t writing for himself — at least to some degree — there’s a good chance he won’t enjoy the experience and will eventually just tire of the whole thing.  At the same time, if the blogger isn’t writing with his audience in mind, he may not be able to connect with readers well enough to get them to come back.
    Like you, I value hearing other people’s perspectives on issues I write about.  I’ve never once hoped to have a blog where everyone agrees with me.  And there have been topics that I’ve come to feel at least a little differently about because people weren’t willing to agree with my position and took the time to respectfully explain why.
    Everything we bloggers are told by “experts” involves finding topics (or a niche) that readers want.  We’re encouraged to use keywords that more readers are searching for, and to build content based on keyword searches would-be readers perform on our site.  I do that from time to time.
    But I think the key to building readership is in being honest about what you have to say.  That shows your audience that you respect them, and even if they don’t agree with you or if one post doesn’t really resonate once in a while, if they know you’ll be true to yourself, I think they’ll be back.
    And that should be one of the main goals for all of us: making the audience come back.

    • PamMktgNut February 26, 2012 at 11:31 pm

       @patricksplace Good words Patrick. As I mentioned to Jen below I think we need a combo of both. On one of the #getrealchat’s a few wks ago we discussed this topic as a community. Where we wound up after an hour plus of discussion was that the greatest success comes when we balance what our readers want with “us” in it. They want to be educated, inspired and read content that will help their life and business. They want to stay up to date on the latest tech, strategies, etc. However, they also want the personal insight of real people. When I think of the blogs I like the most they are the ones where the writer includes their own opinion. obviously every audience and community is different. People are going to connect differently based on different aspects of content, engagement etc. I love your last sentence “come back”! Yes, we want them to be inspired to come back. Thanks for your thoughtful comment and for making me “think”.  Love that. Have a great week! Pam  

  22. PamMktgNut February 26, 2012 at 11:27 pm

    Hey Rick! Great to see you around these parts! 😉 What are you up to these days? Still at HDS? 

  23. PamMktgNut February 26, 2012 at 11:28 pm

    I agree Jen. It’s always a struggle no matter which way you go. I think the best route is to focus on a balance of you and feeding your readers good content. They want content but they want some of “you” in it. Otherwise it’s just like everyone else. 

  24. malharbarai May 23, 2012 at 10:03 am

    Guess, the key is to strike a balance between what they want to read & what you want to speak. Though, its easier said than done. It’s difficult to judge the reader’s preference and at times even we are guilty of pushing our own agenda. Believe, the balance comes only when you know certain followers and start catering to their interest. Painful way, but helps.

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